jege has been good enough to add some images to the then check out the Mock Jesus site, so be sure to take another look!
kiddo home sick from school today. there is also a school bully who has been giving her grief and NOTHING pisses me off like someone bothering my kiddo.
i'm trying to teach her methods of dealing with him that are civil when every fiber in my being wants to tell her to kick his ass. so we're using the method of humor. for instance, when he says "booo!" to her in gym class when they are all running a race, she can sarcastically say "oh THANK YOU! I REALLY appreciate your support!" when he talks to her in class about how he's glad she'll be at his same school next year so he can pick on her, she should reply "thank goodness! how could i EVER go to school without YOU picking on me? my life has meaning again!" and when he takes her stuff from her desk she can say "oh good, i was HOPING AND PRAYING that you would be good enough to touch my belongings!"
what i'd like to be able to tell her what to do in that last example:
"if you take my pencil again, you pathetic waste of dna, you will find it embedded in your ocular cavity."
hang on -- someone from social services is at the door.
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4 comments:
Oh sweet ... he's yanking her pigtails. He might be the one.
it's a sure sign!
Based on my vast reserves of parenting experience, I find that a well-timed exposion of profanity, issued through gritted teeth works best.
Included should be the words Fuck, fucking, fucktard, nutslap (thanks, Chris!), Motherfucker, cuntsmack, shit-muncher, squirrel-molester, and republican.
Abbey would probably call him a republican in defense of herself! That's quite an insult at both our houses =) We role-played several weeks ago so she could practice what to say to him. Same thing... try to be civil. She got quite a kick out of it when I ended one scene with the sweet and simple ... DUMB ASS! (Which was followed by a quick, "Uh, well I guess you can't really say that.") She thought is was pretty funny. Social services here, too, huh?
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