Tuesday, September 28, 2004

lunchtime blog

i've budgeted my time today in a manner that allows for lunchtime blogging...hurrah!
so i sit in my semi-cubicle (pictures to come tomorrow, possibly) whilst eating my microwave oatmeal (bananas and cream flavored -- the one abbey won't eat) and listening to a bit of the old liz phair on my headphones. very soon i'll have more bitchin' things to hang on my cube walls -- and any art submitted by anyone will gladly be displayed in an effort to liven up the old faux walls.
the upper dose of my meds is not so good on days that i have to leave the house by 7 a.m. not sure how that will play out.
i need to watch more Reno 911. anyone watch that? it's a delight.
tonight is dollar night at area cheap theaters, so i think we're (me, sarah, meg, etc.) will be taking part in the will ferrel phenomenon that is Anchorman. it's probably no good, but for a dollar, well, let's just say i've seen worse.
leaving the house can be so tricky sometimes. for instance, i really want to go to the movie tonight, but for some reason the whole idea of not just staying at home is excruciating. but that's b/c i have the crazies.
i still have 20 minutes in which to finish eating, write email to heidiarlene and smoke a cigarette nice.
maybe 45 minutes would be the perfect lunch break amount.

Monday, September 27, 2004

soooooo tired.

little things are happening to me in an effort to make my brain a little less...fragmented; last week i missed a turn on the interstate to go home -- TWICE. tonight i forgot to put conditioner in my hair after i lathered, rinsed and repeated. laugh you may, but now i have the heartache of forgetfulness, drowsiness, dizziness AND tangled hair. this sucks.
so i took the meds about an hour ago and the headache is beginning. and i'm drowsy and for some reason, i keep typing an L when trying to type an S. as though the ring fingers on my hands decided to pull an ol' switcheroo mid-word.
i really do love sleep. at night, when i need to. right now my process is take pills, get sleepy, become comatose, remain sleepy until noon (even though i work at 8), wake a little but still be yawning and drowsy until about 4 or 5, then i'm fully alert and very happy by 6 but then at 8 the process begins again. so from 6 to 9 i'm at my peak hours. three hours of the day, folks. week one is officially done, so hopefully i will become a little more used to this stuff by the end of week 2. and friday i see pj harvey, so all will be right again in the world.
until i listen to Air America some more, and then become more enraged/depressed/aware/disgruntled/determined.


lunch breaks go way too fast. i opted for the 1/2 hour lunch option so that i can spend my free time commuting in the morning and the afternoon, but after eating, smoking and doing other misc. things i can't do on company time b/c i feel like a bastard (phone calls, lining up dr. appts., etc) i now have one minute to blog. i will be sending off the blasted emachine computer this evening, so hopefully my laptop and i will be reunited by this time next week.
and my minute is gone. shite.

Saturday, September 25, 2004

no news really is good news!

so the lack of updates on my new job in no way should lead one to think the job is crap: it is the absolute opposite of crap... non-crap! the hours are decent and abagail-friendly, the people are helpful but not overbearing and the deadlines are not horribly intense -- i enjoy my current gig! however hellacious the drive from st. paul to plymouth may be, a job is a job and a good job is even better.
my laptop, sadly is faring none too well -- the freakin' thingy that the thingamajig adapter for the power goes into in the back won't keep it in place, so on monday, off to emachines the laptop goes for repair whilst still under warranty. this is why people get macs. but i've grown attached to my emachine and would like to keep it happy. but i'll be without aforementioned emachine for up to FIVE BUSINESS DAYS which, in short, may as well be FOREVER. so maybe it will be blogging from the office during lunch break for moi.
medication is going alright -- have increased my dose to further looking like i am stoned and to reduce my conversational ability to that of common radish, but all in all, going better.
and now my sister is here!

Friday, September 24, 2004

Info about America's Army

This is from my sister's boy, Chris...a good lad:

"I know for a fact that the US Army has thrown more than $15 million at this and that there is a staff of 300 which continue to work on the game. In the whole scheme of things, the U.S. Military has an annual budget of around 800 Billion Dollars, and a force of 700,000+... thus, this is a drop in the bucket. The Army spends more money on those stupid "Army of One" television commercials. The interesting part of this game, however, is the multiplayer. That is, you log on to the Internet and play vs other people. When you login, you are put on the American side... the problem is, both sides are the "American" side. You see people on the opposite team as your "enemies" even though they see themselves as U.S. Infantry. A real battle of Good Vs. Evil where everyone thinks they are on the "good" side. See any analogies in that? Regarding Hitler, he didn't really need any propoganda to sway the people. If you didn't agree with him, the SS killed you."

scary stuff.

Horrible, absolutely horrible.

the latest in america's recruitment:

imagine if hitler had access to computer game programming......

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

oh hell...this is funny.

nickelback really sucks. and here is a lovely link to prove it. two nb songs, one on top of the other, and there is such little difference, it makes me want to pull off my skin. take a listen == you might be sorry, but you'll then immediately feel like a better person for not owning one nb cd. see? i can't even bring myself to type the whole band name. THAT'S how bad they are. props to joe mammy for bringing this link to my attention. i think this might be the same site that introduced that dandy little "The Bush Campaign's TV Commercial if He was Running Against Jesus" picture.
so it's been 22 hours since i first took the sedating medication and i was soooo freakin' tired this a.m., rush hour was a bit disorienting. however you can see from my earlier post that i scored PJ HARVEY TICKETS. word to my boy, D-Hizzy, for facilitating that purchase.
and in about two hours i take pill two and it sucks ass that i'll be a zombie until tomorrow a.m. and what is this glorious medication, and what sort of side effects can one expect? stay tuned.....

pj harvey! pj harvey!

that is all.......

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

a post from the office

the laptop is having adapter issues. more specifically, issues with the adapter not staying plugged into the laptop. so emachines is making me send it in. warranty, schmarranty. so i've been blogging less. and tonight i start new medication. and that, sadly, will chew into my prime blogging time, as after 10 p.m. i will sort of be dead to the world for a couple of weeks. good times, that crazy stuff. so i'm at work, using the last of my lunch break. i ate oatmeal. blueberry flavored. generic cub foods brand. i may supplement my lunch with goldfish crackers. we'll see.
what if no one is going crazy and there are just some really fucked up things going on?

Sunday, September 19, 2004

link of greatness!

okay, lately i've offered a lot of delightful links, but NONE compare to THIS. it takes a little while to load but, as i've told some that i've sent it to, it would almost make me want to hang out with George W. if: 1) he still drank this way, and 2) if he weren't the first horseman of the apocalypse.
and titanic is on. kate! leo! i'll never let go!

Saturday, September 18, 2004

mmmm, chips!

now i'm not sleepy. at all. tis half past midnight and i'm on my bed, eating bbq chips and drinking an ice cold coke (product placement). in the morning i will awaken to find my keyboard covered in bbq chip dust, but for now i will simply enjoy.
things i've been thinking about...

top sheets: what purpose other than to become untucked and then tangled up in the blanket? i suppose they make a nice, lightweight blanket in autumn when it's too cold to be without but too warm with the comforter, but really...

my king-sized bed: when walking into my room in the dark, it doesn't matter where i go because if i trip (as i oft do), i will inevitably land on the biggest bed in the world. and certainly the biggest bed in this small of a room. it kicks a fair amount of ass.

whether or not to wake dustin from sleeping on the couch: he fell asleep reading on the couch and i thought i could wake him...or i could eat bbq chips in bed and not have a complex over someone waking up next to me as i reeked of mesquite flavor. so the score: Dustin, zero, KC Masterpiece flavored chips, 1.

i need to download some computer yahtzee and solitaire to find more distractions from housework, hygiene, etc. anyone know of where to find free stuff like that?

have discussed quitting smoking along with mr. terry walker and we have chosen the date of oct. 3. that way when he turns 30 in november, he'll have a good month of patchiness under his belt. or wherever he decides to put the patch. that's none of my beeswax. i find on my forearm to be the best place for it not to slip around, begin to stick to itself and eventually fall off completely. pretty shotty construction, if you ask me.
i mentioned to dustin that he could quit too, did he want to try at the same time, and his response was a tentative "I don't know..." i think we're making progress. usually he answers by lighting up a cigarette and then putting it out on my arm... only kidding, of course. but it was a funny image in my head.

it's certainly not required for him to quit smoking if i quit, but the likelihood of me punching him in the face is a great deal less if he is not going out to the porch to smoke every hour while i struggle with my inner demons only a few feet away. no, i would never punch him. i'd much rather be a martyr. "no....you don't need to smoke in the back of the house...really...i don't mind seeing you smoke...." i'm charming that way.

martyrdom would have it's perks in the grand scheme of things. everybody would know your name (usually only achieved as a regular at Cheers), buildings would be named after you, movies would be made -- and remade -- about your trials and tribulations. i think what joan of arc REALLY has going for her was simply her name... single syllable words together work well.
"Joan of Arc." That is clean, crisp, easy to remember and it rolls off the tongue.
"Kari of Minnesota." Not as interesting. "Kari of North Dakota" is even worse. My two syllable name causes a problem right off the bat. a six-pack of beer to the first person to come up with a suitable martyr name for me. bring it. (THIS OFFER NOT VALID IN VIRGINIA, DELAWARE OR RHODE ISLAND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. NON-TRANSFERRABLE. CANNOT BE COMBINED WITH ANY OTHER OFFERS. OFFER EXPIRES 10/03/04. )

Friday, September 17, 2004

this is beauty. props to joe mammy for sending it thisaway. Posted by Hello

and here's the link for that funniness.....


love this link so much. it is currently printed out and hanging above my computer at work. good stuff. so we're removing the carpet from the first floor of our house. sunday. with booze, hopefully. be there or be square. i'll update this blog with photos from the... the..... ADVENTURE. dustin, me, booze and a carpet knife.... i think this might be a recipe for disaster, but i'll risk it for hardwood floors.
now that i'm working and haven't much time to blog, i'm finding that my posts are lamer and lamer. it's sad what i have to sacrifice for a paycheck. wait. i like getting a paycheck! screw blogging!
(i'm just kidding, baby, come on back...)

Thursday, September 16, 2004

link of goodness

the jegg came through again w/the goods...here's a nice little corollary to the link about the pentagon....you won't be sorry!

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Conspiracy? Wha?

Okay, so dustin just sent me this link. it seems pretty nutty but i guess it's something to think about. any thoughts, anyone?

cat love

we have many cats. two -- count 'em -- two are in that warm way. and they are slowly driving me to insanity and back. (it really doesn't take that long, you know.)
and i am constantly suspicious of cat behavior. i now just assume they are "staking out" a new area in which to urinate. most recently: an area behind our dining room table. and i have steam cleaned the carpet, thanks my my sister's steam machine. but now i always keep one on the cats. so if there are typos in this, it's because i'm only using one eye to look at the screen. and i fear i will develop a permanent headache if i keep this up. it's hard being me.
will be visiting with ye olde shrink on friday to discuss medicinal additions, because i'm not enough of a malady that i want to carry around as many prescription bottles as possible. i want to look and sound like a pharmacy on legs. but don't come looking to me for any narcotics, because i've none to share -- i mean, i've none in my possession.
is codeine a narcotic?
i'm not hardcore. i'm not "all that."
i've been glancing over a book that i bought on borderline --it's none too shabby, but all books relating to borderline have horrible titles.

"I Hate You -- Don't Leave Me," "Stop Walking on Eggshells," and who can forget the classic "Lost in the Mirror"... with all these great hits, who could ask for more?
But that's not all...tell 'em what they get, Roy!
"The Angry Heart," "The Siren's Dance," "Sometimes I Act Crazy," "Get Me Out of Here," and many more!
"Lost in the Mirror" is the one that I "Lost in the Mirror" have read most recently. The first one I read was the paperback goodie "I Hate You -- Don't Leave Me." It's like self help for those who don't want self help.

Here's a real treat: Chapter Five in the "Mirror" book has a quote from a PAT BENATAR song! "Love and pain can be one and the same in the eyes of a wounded child." From the song "Hell is for Children." Nice. It's important to draw a parallel between what I go through every day and PAT FREAKIN' BENATAR. but, love is a battlefield.

And for the most part, the quotes are a little silly. But there is one I actually put into brackets with my pen, it was so good:
"I begin to see. Today I am not all wood." -Ann Sexton
That was on the chapter about being in treatment. The chapter that discusses self mutilation is titled "Rescuing the Angel Within." gross. but the quote -- from the bible, actually -- is interesting:
"And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy membes shall perish, and not that thy whole body be cast into hell."

Now, i don't make it a habit to read, let alone WRITE DOWN bible quotations. but that one is interesting.


Tuesday, September 14, 2004

something new......

okay, so one ms. kara luger and i have begun a blog together. it's barely off the ground but keep your eyes peeled for THE TWO Ks.
that is all. go back to watching Queer Eye. i know i will.

Sunday, September 12, 2004


that is all.

Friday, September 10, 2004

freakin' charo!

the surreal life is just too much.
charo has a very taut nose and flava flav and jordan (i think? they're all the same) from NKOTB, and and that FREAK SHOW bridgett nielsen -- "i'm a star in europe," she says. holy crap, she's scary. oh god, it's joey from "full house." what sort of sideshow could this be if "uncle joey" is the sane one, the tolerable one? and he just got SUPER PISSED that jordan said he'd like to take a jacuzzi with mary-kate and ashley olsen. and who the f**k is ryan starr? from american idol? whoever she is, she has a fixation with NKOTB and is all girly and shy with jordan. yeah, that'll last.
oh mi god...i'm utilizing this blog as a running commentary on this fucking show. eeeeeaaaggghhhh....
and so now that i've admitted that, i'll just keep going.
quotes to ponder:
jordan: she (charo) seems like a very assertive woman, and i don't like that....

yeah, jordan is kind of a prick. and bridgette is naked most of the time. okay, i'm done, i need to sleep.

Holy NIN-MOBILE! this just updated on the NIN site, apparently a rollover en route to the west from new orleans.. yikes. like trent needs one more thing holding up the album release... Posted by Hello

Thursday, September 09, 2004

ladies and gentlemen, my boyfriend. Posted by Hello

Jegg-meister! You kick such ass for sending me goodies like this!!! Posted by Hello

effing blogger

okay, i just wrote a huge post and i lost it while attempting to publish it.
okay, well go out and rent "the party's over" -- a documentary narrated/hosted by philip seymour hoffman. really. watch it now. and he's my boyfriend.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004


it's certainly strange getting up and ready in the morning. i'll be leaving for the first day of work in about 20 minutes and i'm a little bit nervous: new people, new office...the usual stuff.
i just finished enjoying a bowl of generic honey graham cereal and some gogurt (yogurt in a tube...strange, no?) and trying to relax by watching absolute crap on television. today's crap is MTV Cribs...because it's REALLY freakin' important to know what the drummer of Blink 182 keeps in his pantry.
in addition to putting 2000 miles to and from minot on my personal odometer, i've also acquired a cold -- and it's fantastic to start a new job with a wet, hacking cough. i slapped on a patch today, we'll so how that works.
i know i can always rationalize smoking, but is it really wise to quit with the stress of the first day of work???
they have ipods for pcs now. wait, didn't they always? now it's ipod+hp? wha?
my daughter used to want to visit ireland during her spring break. now it's denmark. and i'm not sure why. i'm sure denmark is lovely -- my grandfather was a dane -- but for an 8-year old to request denmark? strange.
and i hate lenny kravitz. and this gap commercial he is in. oh shite, i have to leave in 15 minutes.
wish me luck.....ugh...new things are good/scary.

Monday, September 06, 2004

why not minot?

because i always get a freaking cold when i'm here. always. as i do right now. so we're (or i'm) hoping to leave by noon so i can be ready for the FIRST DAY OF WORK at the new job tomorrow. it's capitalized because i'm nervous for the FIRST DAY OF WORK. after working with the horrible bigot who badmouthed me at my last gig, i'm really nervous to meet new co-workers. i'm sure it will be fine, but yeah, i'm a little nervous. and it's been four damn months since i've been in an office environment, so it will be a little weird being back in the proverbial swing of things.
so we stayed at a friend's house -- the tenants being adam files, noah files and jay jenkins -- and as i look around i see really funny and interesting things, such as:
- a case in the shape of C3-PO from Star Wars
- five frisbees
- bottle of febreze
- one plate with half-eaten pot roast
- a box an ipod came in
- digital camera
- jar of salsa con queso
college houses are like that, and it makes it fun to stay there.

Friday, September 03, 2004

another day, another trip to minot

i have heartburn from some pan pizza i just ingested. we're leaving to take abbey to her dad's for the weekend and then will leave mpls. for the MAGIC CITY! a wedding tomorrow afternoon with a reception and dance to follow -- should be good fun. a small cat has just jumped upon my collarbone. cute. abbey was just wearing a basket on her head. i adore her. did anyone catch W on tv last night? blah blah blah i've heard it all before and i don't like him. and i don't like hearing the same old, same old from any politician. but i do like kerry. i'm okay with kerry.
thanks to mr. kulig for the neat pictures of the RNC in NYC. we have protests here in minneapolis too, but i've yet to see anyone with missile-like objects affixed to their crotch.
now i have to pack. ugh. packing is tiring. maybe i'll smoke, instead! oh yeah, my friend terry and i might quit smoking on the same day -- this coming tuesday. first day of new job. maybe it'll work this time around. why not quit right now? a weekend in minot, that's why.

Wednesday, September 01, 2004

look who's got a blog!

good old anthony kulig has got himself a blog...hurrah! it's got some dandy NYC Republican Convention pics as well, so check it out -- good stuff.