Monday, October 31, 2005

what a great fucking show

henry rollins -- amazing! i could have listened to him for many many hours. so sharp and witty and clever and the way he presents an issue or an idea --- he doesn't say "this good, that bad," he approaches it from different sides.

and he's hot.


Originally uploaded by kllnin.

henry is one handsome man.

And the winner is......

....going to be announced by tuesday noon, so if anyone wants to add in their two cents for the funniest caption writer ever contest, you have until 10 p.m. tonight to do so.

remember, you can't win if you don't play.

Originally uploaded by kllnin.

Sunday, October 30, 2005

getting ready for tonight

we are having some friends over tonight to watch some campy horror movies and to eat some yummy food. i have accomplished a great deal for a sunday already -- cleaned the kitchen, dining room and living room, AND made some great bars. well, i think they will be great. they look great and they smell great, but i'm holding off on a taste test until later. they are layer bars that have a crust of graham cracker crumbs and butter. covered with sweetened condensed milk, chocolate chips, chopped walnuts and shredded coconut.

and, can i just say for the record, that i'm a total rock star at crushing graham crackers? i thought it would be a very simple feat: make crackers into crumbs. NOT SO! i sat and watched Fright Night on the sci fi channel whilst using a measuring cup to crush many, many crackers. i don't own any sort of food processing apparatus, so it's was up to good old elbow grease, much like the way our ancestors created graham cracker crust, i imagine.

i've also bathed the dog to make her smell less like...well, dog.

left to make: artichoke dip that clogs arteries (parmesean cheese, cream cheese, mayo and artichokes, then baked til all is melted and mixed); bean and cheese dip for the Frito scoop chips; then i need to slice/toast the french bread.
and i even managed to bathe. i've done more today than.....well, than i usually do on a sunday.

very happy about the extra hour of sleep -- i mean, insomnia -- i had after the time fell back. i slept, woke, stayed awake, slept a few minutes and then woke up again at what i thought was 8:30, but then realized it was 7:30. and then i was up for the day.

what's just nuts as hell about my sleep predicament is that during the day, i can pretty much sleep on command. but at night? all bets are off, folks.

it's 3:46. i have 45 minutes until i'm going to make the dips. i've already lit the vanilla candles in the living room to make it smell delightful.

i'm such a susie-homemaker today.

i have a friend in portugal!

Senal Frenada Viseu, Centro (Portugal) made himself known to me on my map!
now, can anyone translate portuguese for me?

"Eu te amo sou! A maioria de divertimento teve."

Saturday, October 29, 2005

definition of tragedy

saturday morning. don't need to be up for a few hours. child still soundly asleep. I CAN'T FALL BACK TO SLEEP. crap crap crap crap crap.

today we'll be at my sister's to celebrate birthdays for two of her boys --- looking forward to seeing the kiddos.

i really want to fall back to sleep, but my brain is too wide awake. and i have this allergy thing, where i feel like i am stuck in that "right about to sneeze" feeling.

we are having some friends over this weekend -- must tidy up the house a wee bit, repair some spots on the couch where the dog's nails have made a hole or two, you know, just the usual stuff.

i was just about to erase everything i've written before this and start over. fuck it. i can't be interesting or funny or quirky or even half-pleasant all the time. this time, i will have a bland post. and that will just have to be okay with everyone. i will continue to speak of mundane things -- my cats being loud, the laundry i've not finished, the cleaning and cooking i need to get done for sunday's get-together -- and i'll just have to be fine with that.

i read in a blog a little while ago, someone joking about needing to snort some coke off of a hooker's ass (funny David!) -- and now that has me wondering how that whole idea started, b/c it's not the first time i have heard that joke. was there one person who first thought of the idea, "hey! what's more taboo then renting a hooker and snorting coke? SNORTING COKE OFF THE RENTED HOOKER'S ASS!" are there people, right this very second, snorting coke off of an ass? how comfortable does one have to be with their body to allow snorting to happen on it. show of hands: how many of you would allow anything to be snorted off of your ass? then again, i suppose if you are comfortable with being rented for sex, maybe you are plenty comfy with your ass being used as a tray. maybe the world would be a better place if we could all feel that comfortable with our bodies. not for use with drugs, mind you, but just being able to have a body part in plain, well-lit view and be totally comfortable with that.

i don't know where that came from.

in college i wrote a column for the school paper entitled "Things I Think About Late at Night." usually it touched on the mundane, the everyday, the trials and tribulations of a mother/wife/college student/wannabe writer, but every now and then it would hit on something political, and once i wrote about how the state of ND was going to pass legislation that i felt was hate-filled -- basically it made it legal for the state to NOT recognize homosexual marriages that we legally performed in a different state. it passed and i was plenty upset about it, and then i began receiving hate mail. i remember i received a an anonymously typed bible passage on a freakin' post-it note (was i not good enough for a whole piece of paper?) and then a fake dollar bill with clinton's face on it was included in the envelope -- the dollar was called a Clinton Queer Three Dollar Bill. i'm not surprised that there are morons like this, that there are cowards who send mail like this to people -- but i was disturbed that this lunatic now knew where i lived...with my very young child. gross.

my daughter wants to be in theater. and as a former theater kid, i'd love to see her do it. and it got me thinking about the plays i've been in. which i shall now list:
grade 2
Peter Rabbit --- cast as Peter's Mother
grade 4
Little Miss Christie --- cast as some random, four-line delivering person
grade 4
A Christmas Carol --- cast as some random, walk-on kid
grade 6
Sorcerer and Friends -- the good fairy (don't laugh! i was a GREAT good fairy!)
then, after a brief hiatus to have a nervous breakdown, to be in pom-pom and volleyball....
grade 10
Just So Stories -- Mother Jaguar (it was children's theater, for pete's sake)
You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown -- Patty
grade 10 summer
Baby -- cast as Mommy (do you see a theme running here?)
grade 11
The Apple Tree -- total walk-on, no lines casting
A Doctor In Spite of Himself -- Lucinde
grade 12
Fiddler on the Roof -- Chava

then i stopped doing theater at the high school b/c the director was a total bitch.

then i picked it up again in college, mostly doing black box/student written and directed stuff.

i think about doing it again sometime, but i don't think i've the time -- any time i don't work and i have the kiddo home, i want to be with the kiddo. that's that way it works.

i've now been posting for a half-hour. i could try to fall back asleep, but i don't think it's going to happen unless i have a little one-on-one time with Prince Nyquil, so nevermind. maybe i'll watch a movie. ooh! x files. that would be PERFECT. i heart you, mulder!

Friday, October 28, 2005

there's still time......


come on now, don't be shy


this might be the end of times afterall...

THIS was featured on last night's Daily Show. ewwww......

picture fest

my kid found a Liger shirt at Target. she was very, very excited about it.

my kiddo. my sweet girl.

bettering oneself

hopefully things in the old noggin will be calming down. i'm still reviewing the submissions on the funny captions and i'll have a decision made on monday night...right before i see HENRY FUCKING ROLLINS.

dustin: are you talking about your noggin again?
me: ... and?
dustin: just checking.

(he's right next to me as i type this. and he's very clean-shaven.)

dustin: am i interferring with your noggin analysis?
me: no.
(long pause)

dustin: so analyze!
me: (blank stare)

and now he's holding a cat while humming "jesus walks" by kanye west.

dustin: it sounds like "three blind mice" for some reason.

oh yeah -- bettering oneself. i'm only going to surround myself with people who are nice to me on a regular basis.

and when i'm at work or anywhere else where people are being total fuckers and decide that they don't feel like being civil anymore, i will pretend i neither see nor hear them. "la la la la la" will be what i say whilst covering my ears. this will lead me to be a better person because i won't be in a position to feel or say horrible, mean, awful things.

i'm going to work toward not letting the actions or moods of other people determine what kind of a person i feel like. i'm tired of it and i'm tired of not having any control over what i say or do or feel. i've got to do something.

go me. GO FREAKIN' ME!

aren't fridays supposed to be better than this?

do you ever just want to be the person who you really think you are sometimes? to say what you want to say the moment you want to say it? all those mean, insipid comments can just come flowing from your mouth like little pearls of hatred?

"no, i don't want to fit you ad into my paper. why? because you treat me like shit and i'm fucking tired of it, that's why."

"maybe people would be more helpful to you if you weren't such an insufferable bitch."

"if you continue to ask me stupid questions i will continue throwing this wad of used kleenex at you."

"i'm cranky because you are stupid and don't know how to do your job."

i guess i'm not to be toyed with today. i tire of it. i tire of pretending i'm a nice person when really, i'm kind of mean.

the jig is up.

is this really friday?

i ran out of gas on the way to work today. why? because i'm a total tool, that's why.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

it's game time!

okay, GO! no, wait!
let's call them, from the top, A, B and C. you can do all or one or none. the ones that merit the most giggles from me WIN THE UNDETERMINED BUT WONDERFUL PRIZE!

okay, GO!

am i back in mental shape?

that remains to be seen. but i do have a fun lil' project for the blog. very soon i will post some images that i found through our really crappy clip-art service we use at work. i want you all to come up with clever captions for the images. the most clever comment will win a prize! but i don't know what that prize will be. it could be a solid gold hat, it could be a monkey paw ..... ooh! the mystery! but keep the eyes peeled for the pics.

and who is judging this contest? ME! so be nice...

one angry man
Originally uploaded by kllnin.

john hughes: funniest man ever

oh captain
Originally uploaded by kllnin.

this is john hughes. not the director. the fact that this photo exists -- this photo shows the appropriate emotion for approaching the town of Downer -- well, it makes me think the world is a better place.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

statcounter tells no lies

so according to this piechart, i have learned the following:
the green represents less than five seconds visited on my blog.
light blue is from five to thirty seconds.
light pink is thirty seconds to five minutes.
orange is five to twenty minutes.
red is from 20 minutes to one hour.
yellow is longer than an hour.

so my question is, why in the hell would you want to read this for over an hour? who are these people who are lurking for an hour? yikes.

all this and....

i am going to miss liz phair at first ave tomorrow night. damn it.

does blogging keep one sane?

does blogging keep one sane? does the act of writing bring you back to your true self? what happens when you find your true self and it's actually several "selfs" and you are trying to simply integrate them into one only to find that it's not possible? and i want to keep writing to keep myself sane, and at the same time i want to not write anymore at all. yes, friends, it's a soul-baring moment here. what happens when the soul is bare? besides it being a wee bit chilly, it's not incredibly enlightening, i've found. it's disheartening, a break from the illusion of who you think you are and you realize that we are all just ... sinking. sinking under the weight of these lives we lead, hoping that maybe, like virginia woolf or van gogh, some form of greatness will seep out of our misery and despair and mania and there will be great beauty that comes from great pain. but i know that people like that -- the ones who we all remember to be these tragic but creative giants are in the minority. the rest of us -- the mediocre, jacks of all trades but masters of none, we just suffer and nothing comes from it. except the hope that maybe tomorrow if i feel melancholy, i won't feel like i have a broken heart, that i'm being crushed from the inside. maybe i'll just feel melancholy and that will be it.


ever have one of those melancholy days where you question everything you know? is this really who i am? does anything i say matter? do my hips really look that way in those khakis?

i'm overanalyzing. i'm scattered and yet preoccupied. it's hard seeing the world function and everyone go about their lives, seemingly unjarred by things around them and i become so affected. when i'm mad, i'm furious. when i'm sad, it feels like i'm being torn apart inside. why is it so hard to just land in the normal range of emotions? why is my brain dictated by a fucking disorder?

it's scary not to be able to trust your senses, your thoughts, your idea of how things really are. to not be able to trust that you are accurately judging a situation, that the way you are seeing things is not how they actually are. it's like when you look out a window and there is frost on that window. and you see something, but you are not sure what it is... is that a person? a tree? then you assume one thing and you find that it's actually another.

now i'm just rambling like a crazy person. like a crazy person. what a statement. dark times these are, kiddos. and just remember -- when you think things have gotten really bad and you are hitting bottom, you still have a long, long way to go. keep your hands inside the windows, kiddos.

my resolve for the day? shot to hell.

so i brought a bottle of water to work today b/c i drink WAY too much coca-cola....b/c it's the best drink in the universe. here is my thought process:
"for every can of coke today, i will drink six bottles of water. and that will help control my cola intake, THUS leading to possible weight loss."

then the owner's wife brought in cookies. chocolate chip. damn it. but at least i am washing them down with water.

but man, a coke would taste good.

i have zero will power, folks. NONE.

and to think i entertained the notion of not smoking today...HA!

seriously though, i'm considering slapping on the old patch starting sunday. i did so well, not smoking for eight months and then i collapsed. much like my lungs will if i keep this up. so for now i'm saying sunday*.

*see above "zero will power" comment.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

i love watching this actor

he's was charismatic. his delivery -- perfectly timed. he had this way about him, an everyman sort of quality. he looked like someone you might know, might spend time with, might be friends with. the handsome cary grant -- the a-lister of his time -- looked unattainable and out of reach (but he was a fantastic actor nevertheless).

in today's hollywood market, it's like, say, the stereotypically attractive brad pitt compared with someone less "attractive" but more charismatic, like philip seymour hoffman. and this charisma, this level of attainability, is what makes PSH more attractive to me than mr. pitt.

great movie night 2, continued.

the above is the next attraction. conveniently on vhs right after "say anything," so no actual movement is required.

just like jege's, but with a couple additions

okay, so after receiving the zillionth "Get to Know Your Friends" chain email, the leingirlz3 and i (and a few others) put together our own little version. here is the famed list --- distribute it amongst yourselves.
What you are supposed to do is copy (not forward) this entire e-mail and paste it onto a new e-mail that you'll send. Change all the answers so they apply to you, and then send this to a bunch of friends, including the person that sent it to you.

1. Tampons or pads?

2. Whom would you most like to kill?

3. Would you shoot, stab, or strangle him/her?

4. Favorite element?

5. Top or bottom?

6. Favorite fascist dictator?

7. Wipe front-to-back or back-to-front?

8. Burial or cremation?

9. Paper or plastic?

10. Divorce or murder?

11. Mini-blinds or granny drapes?

12. Do I look fat in this?

13. Who's better, the Beatles or the Stones?

14. Don't you hate it when people say "EYE-talian" instead of "IH-talian"? Explain.

15. What kind of siding do you have on your house?

16. Favorite PMS remedy?

17. Have you ever shot a man just to watch him die?

18. What is your most shameful Home Shopping Network purchase? Is it a figurine of some sort? It is? EEEEEWWWWWWW....

19. extra mayo or hold the mayo?

20. What's cooler, the quadratic equation or Avogadro's number?

21. Tesla: heavy metal band or inventor/scientist?

22. Who sent this to you, and are they so fucking dead the next time you see them?

23. The Clash: Should they stay or should they go?

24. The one dentist out of ten who hated trident... man or myth?

25. Nick and Jessica or Sonny and Cher?

26. Is "Forte" (as in, piano is not my forte) pronounced "Fortay" or "Fort?" And do you really give two shits? Really? Oh. Okay then.

27. Can you sing all the words to that song by Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam--you know the one where they mispronounce "Que Sera Sera?"

28. Which "Heather" are you? "Tweety", "Megabitch" or "Corn Nuts"? Explain.

29. Most of your time on the computer is spent: a.) doing work, 2.) looking at porn or c.) trying out out-witty your friends and family with mockeries of email chain letters

30. Do you have a trophy husband who looks like Cary Elwes? You don't? Well Jege does. Ha ha ha.

31. Were you born a poor, black child? I was.

32. Have YOU found YOUR "special purpose?"

33. Cheney, Rumsfeld, Bush: Axis of Evil or Trio of Idiots?

34. Which best describes you? A. Trump's "You're Fired" B. Flo's "Kiss My Grits"

35. The Coreys: Haim or Feldman?

36. Brand, Mikey, Chunk, Data, Mouth, Stef or Andy -- Which Goonie Are You?

37. Are you: A little bit country or a little bit rock n roll?

my blog worth

My blog is worth $2,258.16.
How much is your blog worth?

night of great movies, part 2

this is first on the agenda.

Monday, October 24, 2005

see? taking over the couch.

see what i mean?

apparently i am chocolate.

What Flavour Are You? I am Chocolate Flavoured.I am Chocolate Flavoured.

I am sweet and a little bit naughty. I am one of the few clinically proven aphrodisiacs. Sometimes I can seem a little hard, but show warmth and I soon melt. What Flavour Are You?

now it's YOUR turn!

Add yourself to my map! (i'm totally copying jege) i copy b/c i love...

blogging like there is no tomorrow

"taffeta, darling."

so now i'm watching "clue," (the burbs is on vhs and i only have dvd in my room) and i was just thinking how much madeline kahn had such brilliant comic timing. and you know where the above photo comes from.

best movie line!

"it smells like they're cooking a goddamn cat over there."

this is my third attempt at blogging

and not because of technical problems, but i keep typing, realizing that what i've written is silly and not worth the effort, then i delete it and start again. here are the topics i've just nearly written about:

1. my blog photo looking more serious than i actually am.
2. how some people in this world are drop-dead gorgeous and others have to rely upon with and cleverness. but we still envy the drop-dead gorgeous.
3. how some bible lady just stopped by to invite us to a bible study down the street, b/c in times of moral depravity like these, no one thinks about their soul anymore.
4. what happened to the coreys? (feldman/haim)

so if you would like to comment on any of the above topics, go right on ahead. i'm here for you.

animals are taking over my couch

i'm watching "you've got mail" because it was a stressful day at work and this fluffy movie puts me at ease. i would ordinarily be watching this movie from my couch, but instead there are three animals on it -- one dog and two cats. and they are taking up the WHOLE DAMN THING.

okay, "you've got mail" just ended. now i'm starting "the burbs," and i'm not purposely turning this into the night of tom hanks, but honestly, isn't this movie great?

favorite quotes:
"there go the goddamn brownies."
"satan is good, satan is our pal."
"no, I've never seen that, I've never seen anyone drive their garbage out to the curb and bang the hell out of it with a stick. "
"What have you got in the cellar, HERR Klopek!"

monday. ugh. monday.

so the foot is healing up quite nicely. am able to now walk without aid of crutches or limping like a pirate with a wooden leg. although that does have a certain charm to it, as long as you have an eyepatch and a parrot. however i lack those, so saying "aargh, matey" seems....silly.

the above post was started earlier in the day when i was just mostly fried from putting together awholelotta news pages. i'm now home. hours later and COMPLETELY fried from putting together awholelotta news pages.

awholelotta. real word. look it up.
(i'm a liar. not a real word. i lie.)

Saturday, October 22, 2005

are these my neighbors?

i think some people who live down my block must have really poor hearing, b/c whenever they are outside on the street, they really have to shout at each other. and what they are shouting must be really important, because they have a tone in the voice that one might call "angry."

this will kick b-movie ASS!


like the olson twins, but MORE evil

this is why it's important for the smart people i know to start having babies immediately, b/c THEY are outbreeding the rest of us!

Friday, October 21, 2005


so i was leaving work today and i managed to step down ONTO my ankle. not my foot. my ankle. so if anyone has any crutches they'd like to lend to me, i'll take 'em, b/c i CAN'T FREAKING WALK.


i read once that spraining an ankle is more painful than breaking one. so i'm now considering going outside to break my ankle to allieviate the pain i'm experiencing.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

oh mi god....


that's just not fair. and i know that no one ever said that life was fair. but that is SO NOT FAIR.

"even senators get lucky."


this is post 623

i sure have posted a lot.

well i haven't checked my powerball numbers yet, but according to the star tribune, a ticket matching all six of the damn numbers was sold in oregon (is that you, jege?), so i'm guessing it's safe to say that i didn't win. after all my hard work. nuts.

my kiddo woke me up this a.m. around 3 -- i don't remember the reason but i'm sure it had something to do with getting her a glass of water -- and now she is sleeping next to me. and the kiddo laughs in her sleep, it'd the damndest thing. she's done it ever since she was a baby and when i hear it, i can't help but giggle along with her, and it seems to make her do it more. it's a good time. and now you know what i do in the middle of the night. i giggle.

my weekend has been shortened by one day -- a coworker is going out of town this weekend and i will have to work on sunday to paginate her newspapaer. working on the sabbath! what? but days like that do have perks, i.e. very few, if any, coworkers in the building. ability to play whatever cd i want at pretty much whatever volume.

a few minutes until i must make myself all pretty and work-like. but in 48 hours, i will begin my "stay in pajamas all day" saturday. so there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

one hour until i am a bazillionaire

okay, so i think they draw the numbers for powerball in about an hour. and i'm sure i'll be a winner, simply based on the following (this has nothing to do with the actual odds):
- i've been known to be clever
- i'm not a terrible dresser
- i know a lot about movies
- i am only a few degrees from kevin bacon
- i don't have the worst singing voice in the world
- ......

....fingers crossed...

top reasons for not wanting to get up for work

the 2 a.m. insomnia moved itself to 4 a.m. oy. i'm so tired that my eyes actually hurt. how can i put together a newspaper with pained eyes?
the space heater feels so nice on my feet.
i just haven't a thing to wear!

i feel these are all compelling reasons to stay in bed. even my laptop right this moment is like a mini space heater on my lap. damn. damn the man. it's time to go to work.

as an aside, i bought a powerball ticket a few days ago....the drawing is tonight, i think? if i win, i promise you this: much more blogging, much less working.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

bill o'reilly on the daily show!

so i'm posting as i watch this show. jon just asked bill why he's so angry. and that he's he seems to pick on the little guys. and bill is mocking steven colbert's show is just some french guy. and this colbert report just happens to compete with the "no spin" show. and bill is accusing jon of making light of the katrina victims.
jon: we do add insult to injury.
bill: an honest man.
jon: but you add injury.
and now bill called france "our enemies." and that jon is "buying into this left wing lie." and he called jon a pinhead!!! someone, take out his kneecaps!
jon: if this were the peanuts series, france would be marcy... lucy's the problem! go out and get lucy!
bill: i don't trust any politicians.
jon: so you're on our team.
bill: no.
so bill was on the show promoting his book for kids. yeah, that's on abbey's reading list for sure!

the last time bill was on the daily show, he seemed like he was a very different person than when he's on his show. tonight? it was the bill we all know and shudder over from fox.

we were out to eat with some friends on friday night and they reported to us that in the restroom you can buy condoms. but not just any condoms. tickler condoms. but not french tickler condoms, b/c that's unamerican. they were FREEDOM TICKLERS.

so watch the colbert report, if for no other reason, it hurts o'reilly's feelings.

who has been visiting me?

According to statcounter, these locations have been visiting my humble blog:
New Jersey
Saudia Arabia
Washington State

and in the words of captain narcolepsy, welcome to hell, folks, keep your hands inside the windows...


1 small remote control. i've looked in all the places where it might/should/could be. it's gone. if anyone finds a remote control, can you let me know and bring it to me? thanks.

watch this movie


Huge props to Geffre....

abbey 3
abbey 1
abbey 5

Monday, October 17, 2005

i ate a sandwich with hearty bread

now, the hearty bread is just that -- quite hearty. and it's good, don't get me wrong, i like it. but there are times that i yearn for the squishy white bread. tonight was one of those times.

i just blogged about bread. damn.

to those of you in houston....

GO! you won't be sorry...

trying to get up for work

oy. it's half past six in the a.m. and it's still dark. and that makes it hard to get out of bed. i've been awake since six and have been able to procrastinate getting ready for work by reading blogs, reading news and checking email.
i just remembered that it is apple cider and doughnut day at work. basically they give us food make us feel like we are important. ironically these doughnuts will rot away at my teeth, which have no dental coverage from my employer, so it's not a big draw for me.
okay, i'll sleep 10 more minutes, and then i'll really get up for work...

Sunday, October 16, 2005

i'm going where?

Trail of Terror? That doesn't sound too scary, maybe i'll check out the website...

crap! i'm going to scream like a little girl...

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Google fun, part III

and what does Dustin need?
Dustin needs our prayers
Dustin needs someone from 2-3:30 on Friday to tell the candidates that they are leading tours correctly
Dustin needs to be physically carried, have special foods prepared and to be given his medications
Dustin needs a highly structured setting with a safe and consistent environment
Dustin needs to meet with Keila after the meeting
Dustin needs to tell Hunter something
Dustin needs more than spotting a bead of sweat
Dustin needs car to grab food at 10:30
Dustin needs is the right record company
Dustin needs to move on

from those heavenly people ...

... who brought you "The Shining," here is "Cabin Fever."

i'm so happy these exist...

Friday, October 14, 2005

dust has a funny blog, too!

dustin is known for his cadaver politk goodness, but now he's created a blog with all sorts of goodies at his additional blog. give it a look-see, you won't be sorry.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

a really long day

we've installed a new server at work. and by "we" i mean "our guy from First Tech." and the usual glitches show up, as expected -- and by "usual" i mean "our OS 9 system doesn't want our Quark to function with the new server."
so we need OS X. which i would LOOOOOVE, but i'm sure it's not in the budget. which means we have an irritating work-around-it type of scenario that is pretty unsightly. oh well.

the kiddo is in bed -- finally -- after having the "i'm really tired and therefore will be as impossible as can be" tantrum. yeah, i could do without that.
now my mind is wired and spinning and i can't quite calm it down, even though my body is tired beyond belief.

i was brushing my hair tonight and saw a very, very shiny, white hair. it's not the first one i've seen, but for some reason the moment i saw it, it sort of highlighted the other ones around it that i'd not yet seen. i wonder if i stopped dyeing my hair i would be all salt-and-pepper. (not to be confused with salt-n-peppa. nothing about this makes me wanna shoop.)

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

a day filled with posts...

...that didn't really say much at all, did they?
trying to get to a point where i will actually fall asleep if my light is turned off. little brother is tormenting me (he's a cat, that's his thing) by being all sneaky-like and attempting to bite my toes under the blanket. i'm all tucked in and there he is, trying to rile me up. i respond with a jerking motion of the foot and a harsh word.
once again a week is half over and it feels like an eternity, getting just to this point. am considering another friday night movie with the kiddo -- who, by the way, got her school pictures back already! she looks so old in them -- i know she's not a little kid anymore, but it's slightly alarming.
hey, i just might be sleepy.

this is my element.

P... Phosphorous
You scored 38 Mass, 42 Electronegativity, 41 Metal, and 10 Radioactivity!

You're high energy... really high. Unfortunately, you don't always put
your energy to calm constructive use and sometimes let it all out in
intense bursts. If your energy can be harnessed however, you will
produce truly great things. I suggest you take up a job that runs you
ragged... like opening and closing a Sodium-Potassium pump. Socially
you ought to hang with a crowd that is even more social than you. If
you don't, well... all those people who spontaneously combusted
throughout history... you guessed it, phosphorous people who didn't
have enough to occupy themselves. When picking friends make sure most
of them rated high on the electronegativity scale... Chlorines, Oxygens
and whatnot.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 48% on Mass
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 82% on Electroneg
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 22% on Metal
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 40% on Radioactivity
Link: The Which Chemical Element Am I Test written by effataigus on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

the google test: part II

What Kari Wants:

kari wants to do 43 things
Kari wants to touch everything
Kari wants to fix “Via Ferrata Style” 150mm long “step bolts” onto the second and first step to speed up the climbing for everyone.
Kari wants to play forward
Kari wants to avoid Peter and the pain he brings
Kari wants readers to believe that her brother was a good driver
Kari wants to surprise her husband, Tyrone, with a fifth anniversary backyard makeover

well, color me suprised...

is this a real shock to anyone?

how many kids do you have?

wow. that's all i can say about this. wow.
they are having babies for the rest of us, i guess.

some pics!

props to Grizzly Adamfor the use of the these photos!

props to jege for the idea!

what do i need? well let me type "Kari Needs" into google and find out...

Kari needs to do something serious and that isn't direct to video
Kari needs to learn how to drive a car at night
Kari needs help with her fashion
Kari needs to prevent her-self from going under
Kari needs a Line Cook
KARI needs an effective system
kari needs high temperature
Kari needs a rest
Kari needs to go run a business someday, perhaps a flower shop
Kari needs to stick with Brad's plan, or at least agree to talk with him before changing their plans.
Kari needs to see the shot.
kari needs the phone *stab*
Kari needs to be a member of the Association.

tonight's setlist

courtesy of
Love Is Not Enough
You Know What You Are?
Terrible Lie
The Line Begins To Blur
March of the Pigs
The Frail
The Wretched
Gave up
Right Where You Belong
Beside You In Time
The Hand That Feeds
Head Like A Whole

Tuesday, October 11, 2005


what an amazing fucking show.
holy crap.
best show i've ever seen.
they played for two hours. phenomenal show. trent is ferocious on stage. the band was so solid. i'm just shaking my head in amazement at how good it was. i knew it would be great, but holy crap -- expectations surpassed by miles and miles.
in short, i need a cigarette.

the wretched
eraser and right where it belongs (with accompanying screen of images including animals, blood cells, bombing victims and george w. and laura dancing. felt like a punch in the stomach in a meaningful way.)

okay, every song was a highlight, but i'd never seen reptile done live before. wish is always great, as is suck. hurt always destroys me just a little bit (even with the drunk frat boys singing along next to me). the hand that feeds might just rival head like a hole as far as angst-anthem status.

and he said we were a great fucking audience. yay, approval from t-rezzy!

in short, i'm like a 15 year old girl all over again. sadly i must now advance back to 30 and get ready for work in the morning. an exciting news design meeting awaits and 9 a.m.

a good time had by all.

the face of a happy girl

leaving for NIN concert soon --- yay!!!

this guy is a total rat

i got this link from originally, and it pissed me off so much that now i'm blogging about it.

it's october 11!!!

and what does that mean? well it's c. george tongen's 22nd bday, so props to him. tomorrow is the 32nd birthday of my lovely aimicita, and i wish i was there with her for it!!!
and also...
so how difficult is it to just sit at work, waiting for stuff to do while i'm watching the clock? IMPOSSIBLE. i would actually like to go home and sleep for a little while. we'll see how early i can vacate my post.

and is this for real? did i just not know this about U2? *shudder*
i feel so dirty.

Monday, October 10, 2005

Sunday, October 09, 2005

desperately botox-ing

so i'm watching (by accident) my first episode of "desperate housewives." i'm not incredibly impressed thus far. maybe it's the thought that right now in the white house, the first lady is watching -- and enjoying -- this show.

as she said it, she is a desperate housewife.


i really needed to get some laundry done. after doing minimal writing at panera today i watched some x files. and napped. and watched another x files. i'm seriously considering more x files in a little while. you know, for consistency.

two days until NIN.

my family...

... in the style of South Park.

horse saliva? what?

last night at quizno's i was drinking dr. pepper. dustin said that there is horse saliva in dr. pepper. and he was serious. can anyone dispute this for me before i throw up?

just in case you were wondering...

i have seen yet another meg ryan movie. i just caught the last 1/2 of French Kiss on TCM. or is it AMC? i don't know which channel, but kevin kline with a french accent is a decent way to end an evening.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

i cook!

it's true! this is what happens when a manic high enters the picture. i went to the farmers' market last weekend and bought all sorts of good eats. however it's taken me this long to get to the eatin' part, so in my craziness i decided that i needed to prepare and/or eat all of them, so they don't spoil.

i made a tossed salad with cucumbers, baby tomatoes and romaine lettuce. (currently sitting in fridge, uneaten. hopefully i can depend on dustin for that.)

i blanched (cooked until transparent) radishes in seasoned olive oil. (currently sitting in fridge, uneaten.)

i cooked a butternut squash. i think it's a butternut squash. is that the small green one? i poked little holes in it with a large knife so that it didn't explode for the 12 minutes in the microwave. then i cut off the exterior, scooped out the seeds, chopped it, added butter and brown sugar and maple syrup. so basically i negated any nutritional content it had and turned it into candy.

this is not sitting, uneaten in my fridge. this is mostly in my stomach.

i may take ye olde puppy for a walk today, b/c it actually seems like fall outside. in these parts of the country, fall is a fleeting notion that pops in and out without any sort of consistency. four days ago it was 80 degrees. yesterday it was 39. today? a fair 52 degrees. that i can live with for a long period of time. sadly i know that's not to be.

dustin and i both agree that the pacific northwest is probably the ideal climate for us. we like rain, we like grey, we like non-extreme temps.

last sunday i went to panera because they have free wireless and they are within a few miles drive of my house. while there i was able to accomplish a great deal of writing on a story that popped into my noggin, so tomorrow i shall attempt more work on the story that i'm really only writing to prove that i can:
1. think up a semi-original idea;
2. convince myself that i can do more than just be a couch lump on sundays;
3. prove that i still know how to use proper punctuation and capitalization.


i was very devoted to doing laundry last weekend. mostly in an effort to avoid doing the dishes.
however since the addition of a insanely cheap used and incredibly wonderful dishwasher, i have now neglected my laundry. why can i not find balance?
oh, and can anyone give me a tutorial on adobe illustrator? my skills are less than what i'd like them to be. and then i can avoid laundry AND unloading the dishwasher. nice.

polls? he doesn't need any stinking polls..

it's a darn good thing that W. doesn't do his job according to the polls, b/c the polls are choking in a big way.

"The far right is starting to be very open about their claim that he's not a real conservative.''

well DUH! the way he spends (on our grandkids' dime, i might add) like a drunken sailor on payday*? the people that put him into office and participated in his crap have no excuse -- the created this mess, they can clean it up.

*i mean no offense to sailors. it's simply an expression.

okay, now i'll go back to blogging about non-confrontational things, like fluffy little bunnies.

my cell phone is a piece of... know.
well, maybe it's a glitch with being dropped/falling out of my pocket...repeatedly. basically it's a three-piece sort of deal, and the face plate pops off upon impact, thus releasing the shotty keypad that has broken into two pieces: the top piece contains OK, CLR, the arrow keys, the green phone, the red phone and numbers 1-9; the second piece contains *, 0 and #.

well since it just fell a short two feet off of an endtable, i cannot find *, 0 and #.

my solution?

i simply will not use these blank keypads. which is unfortunate, as checking my voice mail require two of these three characters. so don't leave me any messages, as i can never check them again. ever.

wait! a pen! i can do the bob dole thing, carry a pen at all times and always be able to check my voice mail. hurrah!

Friday, October 07, 2005

friday night=movie night

here is our cat, little brother. and he is sleeping next to my leg, currently adorned in the best pajama pants on earth.

she's the best.

the kiddo and i have just returned home from an evening at the cheap theater -- we intended on seeing the potentially horrible "fantastic four" but instead saw "charlie and the chocolate factory" for the third time. then i told her the story about when i was her age, i saw "ghostbusters" in the theater NINE times. her response:
"oh, i have your soul!"

she destroys me with stuff like that.

and the plan for saturday? hopefully it involves cocoa wheats, morning cartoons and remaining in pajamas for as long as humanly possible. and my pajama pants are so snazzy, as you can see above, that i could wear them out of the house. but i won't, b/c that defeats the purpose.

i'm all about the pajamas. not only for the comfy factor, but there is something symbolic is wearing them. it says "i no longer have to leave my house today." sure, i could run those irritating errands, but hey, i can't cause i'm already in my jammies. the act of changing clothes at a certain point in the day shows the move onto something else. just as mr. rogers took off the suit coat and the fancy shoes and changed into the cardigan and sneakers, i see the change in attire as necessary for the rest of the day/evening to unfold.

my changing into pajamas says "i am moving out of one part of the day to the next. the part that doesn't involve going to work or the bank or the post office. the part that involves sleep. and count chocula cereal."

holy funny!

“While our attention was focused on fighting evildoers,” said the president. “Our country was attacked by a new enemy, Mother Nature.”

oct. 31

sweet, sweet henry.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

north dakota weather

crazy weather back home.

a better end to a crummy day

the day started off pretty rotten, but i have to say that, without going into the long story, that things are looking up.

and i scored some cool mom points today whilst picking up the kiddo from school. she has been dealing with a rotten kid who likes to tease classmates. my kiddo, being the sweet, kindhearted soul she is, stands up for these teased kids, only to have this monster begin harassing her. today she received a mean note from this monster kid. i sent kiddo on her way to do crossing guard duties and, as i was reading the note, i looked over at the monster child and gave her the patented look of parental disapproval. not a sneer, but a definite stare. i told kiddo of this and i received not one, not two, but THREE high-fives!
nobody messes with my kid.

think about it, though -- if there had been even a few times where someone had stood up for the columbine kids, or any other kids who freaked out because they were being teased too much --- maybe it would have made a difference. i like to think that my kiddo is a difference-maker.

but the downside of this sensitive-soul child is that when the harassment is aimed at her, she has a really hard time letting go of it. just as she feels deeply for the kids who are being teased, she feels 10 times that when her feelings are hurt. and she doesn't forget it anytime soon.

case in point: i went to a wedding a few years ago with dustin. our main duty there was to babysit my niece and nephew, therefore it was easier to not take kiddo. kiddo went to her dad's a couple of hours early, and we figured that would be the end of it.
six months go by and one day i find a framed photo of dustin and i from that day flipped down. why? because she didn't get to go, and the photo reminded her of that.

a chip off the old block, she is.

props to jege!!!

this LINK rules!!!

Wednesday, October 05, 2005


i was going to post a whole damn thing about which countries have visited my blog lately, and then i realized half way through it was nothing more than "blah blah blabitty blah blah." and honestly, who needs to spend time reading that?

too wonderful to be true

props to adrienne for sending me this link!

t-minus six days....


two horsemen bringing in a third...

bringing more scientologists into the world. yikes.

rainy days and ... wednesdays...

last night whilst waiting around for the power to come back on at home, we hung out at a neighborhood watering hole that did have power. in addition to booze.

on the big screen was a swimsuit pageant. not a "scholarship pageant" or a "beauty pageant," an honest-to-goodness swimsuit pageant. the hooters swimsuit pageant. that's right, hooters girls from around the globe were competing for the title of...hooters employee who looks the hottest in a swimsuit, maybe?

as i stared up on the screen, i kept telling dustin "you know i will never, ever look like them, right? you know that, right?" he remained seated next to me, so here's hoping that he knew i was serious and not just being coy.

but we kept watching -- the audio was turned off (like anyone in that bar cared what they had to say) and dustin asked me what i thought of stuff like that. and i guess they are calling it exactly what it is, not under the guise of something else. and predictably so, some yahoo in front of the big screen kept making gestures and groping actions in front of it -- CLEVER, i tell you. and he kept doing it, probably b/c that was the closest he would ever go to actually doing that to Miss Venezuela.

what else do i think about it? do i wish i had a lean physique, as opposed to what could be seen in the reflection of a fun house mirror? oh sure, why not? but when you are that hot, there is little importance in being cool, witty, interesting, or even possessing a smattering of common sense. when you are not that hot, these other traits are honed to a fine point. so i may not be as svelte as i was back in the day, but i'm a whole lot cooler.
(this is a technique i like to call "rationalizing a situation.")

and before all the hot people in the world who read this get all upset, i know that many hot people are cool, witty, interesting and filled with oodles of common sense.

a night in the dark

well a dandy of a storm came through last night -- it lasted quite a few hours -- and it knocked out the power in our neighborhood from 8pm to 2am or so. at first i thought i'd be SO clever and blog about being out of power while that was going on... until i remembered that our wireless router plugs into the wall. so no internet. which, if you are like me and practically joined at the hip with a computer both at work and at home, is pretty excruciating. we watched some of the Daily Show's Indecision 2004 dvd on the not fully charged laptop, so that lasted a short while. what else to do?

so we drove to a neighborhood watering hole that had power to watch some karaoke.

as for my migraine, it's done. i kind of feel like i've been beaten up, but compared to the headache, it's a definite improvement.

tonight will be the kiddo's first day with an instrument at home --- which will lead to me posting some photos of the ritual of afterschool practice. i'm so excited for her! and a part of me is looking forward to seeing if i still remember how to play at all -- it's been a million (okay, 17) years since i picked up a trombone.

the kiddo and i were in her room talking last week and she made the comment "i can't believe that i'm halfway to 18. before you know it, mom, i'll be packing my bags for college."

i laughed at first, but judging how fast this first month of school went, i don't think her estimate is far off. oy.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

i love my porch

i'm on the porch right now (yay wireless!), listening to what might be the last thunderstorm of the season -- i hate to miss it b/c of silly tasks like laundry and cleaning up the living room. the news was speaking of snow and even though i've heard thunder during winter, thunder accompanied by rain is as good as it can get for me.

sidenote: is it wise to be outside, holding a piece of electronics in your lap as there is a lightening storm going on?

i'm also in the works of burning a cd that i'm calling the soundtrack of my life. i do this every so often and it gives a little insight into that gray matter inside my skull. which, by the way, is beginning to not hurt so damn much.

so i love my porch. my dog is sitting out with me and she's horrified by rain. not so much the thunder, but the rain really worries her. because i think she knows that if she were wet, it might give her the option of being fresh-smelling and clean.

i was hoping to hit the cheap theater to check out "the island" tonight for a buck, but that may not be in the cards. i'd like to not have my hand go numb a second day, so i find myself compelled to just lay low.

today's score:

migraine: 1, me: 0.

a quiz:

what's worse than not being able to sleep around 4:30 a.m.?
knowing that you have to start your day in two hours.

Monday, October 03, 2005

so glad monday is nearly over

just a really long day at work. but the evening was topped off nicely by a trip to the arcade bar in st. paul with sarah m. now i must wash off the layers of smoke that has glued itself to my skin. eww. i smoke, but eww, it's not pleasant. however if there is one thing that comes before cleanliness, it's (besides blogging) Count Chocula cereal. mmmmmmmmmmm Count Chocula, you are a tasty treat!

Sunday, October 02, 2005

you guessed it, jege!

who, me?

i am going to make a cd tonight. not from scratch, mind you, for i haven't the technology. but i will use itunes to compile a compilation. a soundtrack of me -- along the lines of "if my life were a movie, these songs would be on it."
trying to keep it from being overwhelmingly nine inch nails. but let's face facts: it will be 50 percent nine inch nails. with maybe a smattering of liz phair (circa 1994) and just a hint of pj harvey and a dash of sarah mclachlan.
maybe. we'll see. and i'll report on the progress.

it's time for...

Guess What Movie Kari is Watching!

here are some hints....

"why can't you just be a friend? why are you such a mega-bitch?"


"i don't patronize bunny rabbits!"

and who can forget

"bulimia is so '87."

time in a pastry shop

the badge of cool that one feels while using a mac in public is undeniable.

doesn't anyone stay together anymore

if this pair can't make it, what hope do the rest of us have?